The Speaker Pile Drives Lauzen

The Oberweis-Lauzen race was a classic match up, one that Lauzen should have easily won.

Pitting a rich, four time losing egomaniac, against an experienced, Harvard educated State Senator seemed like a slam-dunk for Lauzen.

What went wrong?

The sad, ironic truth—Lauzen had the temerity and stupidity to speak for himself, while Oberweis lacked courage but possessed enough foresight to let Pascoe do the talk’in.

The result: While Jim whistled, Chris whined publicly that politics was a crappy business that had cost his family millions.

Great slogan—elect Lauzen, he hates his job and resents the voters.

It seemed that when Lauzen opened his mouth, another Bozo shoe would fall. He would compliment Speaker Hastert for his service but then rip him for being an an "insider" and imply that his health was ailing.

By insulting the Speaker, Lauzen taunted Denny into the race big time. So as Jimbo sat on the sidelines counting calories, the popular Speaker cut commercials, auto dialers and direct mail for Oberus Maximus.

While I had anticipated that Oberweis would spew his dysgalactia and earn another loss, I never imagined that Lauzen would happily douse himself in aviation fuel and start smoking.

But politicians are an odd lot.

They were either hugged too little or breast-fed too long, and although Lauzen may have been the better choice for the GOP to keep this seat, the Milkman finally delivered.