News haikus: From the mouths of GOP babies

"The boys have had enough time to beat up on me behind my back. I'm the front-runner. I expect to get all sorts of abuse." --State Treasurer Judy Baar Topinka during an after-debate Republican lovefest.

OK, then, abuse in the form of haikus, "rich-Republican-fun" edition:

Judy Baar Topinka:
"Not a millionaire,"
Treasurer wants tax returns
From rich candidates.

Jim Oberweis:
"An oxymoron!"
Milk man delivers attack,
But he's worth millions.

Ron Gidwitz:
"This is SNL."
Businessman frowns on new low.
Net worth? Hundred mil?

Bill Brady:
"Candidate who's pure."
Virginal state senator,
A millionaire too.

Andy Martin:
"Don't say nevermore!"
With nothing to say, he sings.
Net worth? No one cares.

(The Daley Show's News Haikus: All the news that fits ... in 17 syllables.)